Candy asks: You mentioned a sleep schedule in your last post, care to explain? I am most scared of sleep deprivation when new baby arrives!
Answer: I was most scared about sleep deprivation as well, so I totally know how you are feeling right now!
What I mean is this: my oldest goes to bed between 8 and 8:30 every night. I make sure I'm in my own bed shortly after that. Normally there's about 30 minutes between the time he goes to bed and the time I go to bed. Even if I'm not tired I try to get into bed by 9pm so that I am at least resting. Most of the time I find that I was more tired than I realized and I fall asleep fairly quickly. Tuesdays and Thursdays are the most difficult nights for me because of Lost and The Office. I try to remind myself that both shows come On Demand and I can watch them later, but sometimes I succumb to the suspense of "what's going to happen on the show tonight".
In the morning I don't wake up until one of the babes wake me up. Normally it's the newborn who wakes me up around 7-ish. If you do the math you'll see I get approximately 10 hours of sleep every night, minus the time when I get up to nurse the baby. Even if I'm up with the baby for 2 hours total I still get 8 hours of sleep each night, which is great.
Nap time for my toddler is right around 1pm every day. Luckily he almost always naps for a solid 2 hours (we normally wake him up at 3pm). During this time, if I need to, I will nap as well. I try to be strict about my toddlers nap time so that if I have a rough day, I can rest assured that at 1pm I will get a break. It can be the light at the end of the tunnel. Since the newborn is still just that, she usually cooperates with me and naps with us. As she gets older it will become more difficult, but by that time she will hopefully be sleeping through the night, or close to it. That is also when we will work to get her napping from 1-3 as well.
Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts
Friday, April 23, 2010
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
sleep training
Have I mentioned that we never taught Trent how to fall asleep on his own? No, I don't think I've mentioned that. Actually, I've specifically avoided it. By this age we should have a routine in place and a set strict schedule....at least that's how the mainstream moms do it. Not us. We're cuddlers. We only get Trent all day for 2 days out of the week, so when he's ready to take a nap you better believe we're going to lay right on the couch and let him nap on or next to us. Once in a blue moon I will put him in his crib at naptime, after he's fallen asleep, but more times than not he wakes right up and cries until I hold him again.
Of course if we're out and about he will nap in the carseat.
At night time, when Trent's tired he will come to us and ask to be held. He then takes his time and falls asleep in our arms. It's only then that we take him up to his crib for the night, where he sleeps like an angel for 12 hours, give or take. Now don't get me wrong - there's been plenty of times where we put him in bed before he's asleep and we'd try letting him cry until he falls asleep - but any parent out there knows how difficult that is. Nobody likes to hear their baby cry - especially when all they want is to be cuddled. So yeah, we always opted for the cuddle scenario over the crying one. Don't judge us! We always knew this wasn't the "right" way to do things, but it worked for us and we loved it. He's only going to want to cuddle with mom and dad for so long, so why not take advantage of it while we can. That's how we looked at it, at least.
....Until recently. I came to the realization that I'm not going to be able to take an hour or two out of my day so that Trent can nap in my arms when I'm on maternity leave. I'm going to need to be able to get up and tend to the newborn...or do dishes....or make dinner....or take a nap myself!!! (I'm really banking on that last one!!) I started to stress out about all this, and last week I finally decided to do something about it.
First, I talked to daycare. I asked her all about Trent's napping routine at her house. I found it hard to believe, but she said he goes down for a nap no problem. She puts him in her "office" where his pack-n-play is, along with another baby (in her own pack-n-play) and the two kids chit chat until they fall asleep. How come I was unable to put him down in his crib at home for a nap?!?!?! She was putting him down when he was awake....at least I waited until he was asleep - it should have been easier for me!!! It just seemed so backward to me. I honestly assumed she actually made Trent "cry it out" everyday but that she didn't have the heart to tell me as much.
I/we decided to start getting Trent used to going to bed on his own at night time first, then I would work on naptime once we made progress in the evenings. Night #1, as usual we turned the lights out at 8. Trent was visibly tired so I took him right upstairs. I rocked him for five minutes until he was just about sleep then I put him in his crib. His eyes shot open, but he didn't cry. I stood there and rubbed his back for another five minutes until he was once again almost asleep. As I walked out the room he started crying. I decided to let him cry while I put my PJ's on then I'd go back and rub his back some more. I timed it - one minute later and he was asleep. Night #2, Kevin put him to bed. Instead of rocking him, Kevin just put him right in his crib and rubbed his back. Again, Trent was basically asleep when Kevin left the room, but Trent knew it and started crying. We timed it - two minutes of crying and Trent was asleep. Every night since then we have taken Trent up to his crib when we notice he is tired and he has gone down with ease. He is still awake every time we put him in his crib, but he doesn't cry or whine or fuss. He just lays down and gets comfy. It's precious. He is such a good boy. I just can't believe how easy it's been.
Trent has always been a great sleeper, so maybe I shouldn't be so surprised - I just figured it was going to be near impossible to break him of this habit that WE created. While it makes me so proud that my big guy can go to bed awake and peacefully drift off to sleep on his own, it also breaks my heart that my little guy doesn't NEED me to help him. He's just the most precious little thing in the world.
Sunday: Trent delayed his nap like no other. Normally he starts his naps sometime between 11 and 1. By the time it got to be 3:00 on Sunday I decided to toss Trent into his crib and just see what happens (I was desperate for him to nap because I wanted to nap in my bed too). I stayed with him and tried rubbing his back but he was ready to play. He'd stand up, sit down, lay down, sit up, stand up, lay down, etc. All the while talking to me and laughing. I laid down next to his crib and read him a book but he just wasn't ready to nap. Or so I thought. After an hour of sitting with him, I had to pee. I decided to leave him in his crib and the second I walked away he started crying - but a girl has to do what a girl has to do. I continued to the bathroom. By the time I was done peeing he was laying down and quiet (that's what? a minute). I was amazed. Apparently the trick is to leave the room. That, and/or the dinosaur pillow that we just started putting in his crib with him. It's crazy comfortable and soft and Trent loves it! I think it helps, but who knows.
Check out My Pillow Pets. I actually JUST learned that Trent's pillow pet is actually an alligator, not a dinosaur. Who knew. But seriously, these pillows are soooooo soft! Look into getting one.
Of course if we're out and about he will nap in the carseat.
At night time, when Trent's tired he will come to us and ask to be held. He then takes his time and falls asleep in our arms. It's only then that we take him up to his crib for the night, where he sleeps like an angel for 12 hours, give or take. Now don't get me wrong - there's been plenty of times where we put him in bed before he's asleep and we'd try letting him cry until he falls asleep - but any parent out there knows how difficult that is. Nobody likes to hear their baby cry - especially when all they want is to be cuddled. So yeah, we always opted for the cuddle scenario over the crying one. Don't judge us! We always knew this wasn't the "right" way to do things, but it worked for us and we loved it. He's only going to want to cuddle with mom and dad for so long, so why not take advantage of it while we can. That's how we looked at it, at least.
....Until recently. I came to the realization that I'm not going to be able to take an hour or two out of my day so that Trent can nap in my arms when I'm on maternity leave. I'm going to need to be able to get up and tend to the newborn...or do dishes....or make dinner....or take a nap myself!!! (I'm really banking on that last one!!) I started to stress out about all this, and last week I finally decided to do something about it.
First, I talked to daycare. I asked her all about Trent's napping routine at her house. I found it hard to believe, but she said he goes down for a nap no problem. She puts him in her "office" where his pack-n-play is, along with another baby (in her own pack-n-play) and the two kids chit chat until they fall asleep. How come I was unable to put him down in his crib at home for a nap?!?!?! She was putting him down when he was awake....at least I waited until he was asleep - it should have been easier for me!!! It just seemed so backward to me. I honestly assumed she actually made Trent "cry it out" everyday but that she didn't have the heart to tell me as much.
I/we decided to start getting Trent used to going to bed on his own at night time first, then I would work on naptime once we made progress in the evenings. Night #1, as usual we turned the lights out at 8. Trent was visibly tired so I took him right upstairs. I rocked him for five minutes until he was just about sleep then I put him in his crib. His eyes shot open, but he didn't cry. I stood there and rubbed his back for another five minutes until he was once again almost asleep. As I walked out the room he started crying. I decided to let him cry while I put my PJ's on then I'd go back and rub his back some more. I timed it - one minute later and he was asleep. Night #2, Kevin put him to bed. Instead of rocking him, Kevin just put him right in his crib and rubbed his back. Again, Trent was basically asleep when Kevin left the room, but Trent knew it and started crying. We timed it - two minutes of crying and Trent was asleep. Every night since then we have taken Trent up to his crib when we notice he is tired and he has gone down with ease. He is still awake every time we put him in his crib, but he doesn't cry or whine or fuss. He just lays down and gets comfy. It's precious. He is such a good boy. I just can't believe how easy it's been.
Trent has always been a great sleeper, so maybe I shouldn't be so surprised - I just figured it was going to be near impossible to break him of this habit that WE created. While it makes me so proud that my big guy can go to bed awake and peacefully drift off to sleep on his own, it also breaks my heart that my little guy doesn't NEED me to help him. He's just the most precious little thing in the world.
Nap time is a little different. Trent takes one nap per day, and we've only been with him at naptime 3 times since starting the sleep training thing. It's hard to say exactly how it's going just yet.
Friday: Kevin and Trent spent the day together and they napped together on the couch.
Saturday: we were out all day (blog to follow) so Trent napped in the car.
Sunday: Trent delayed his nap like no other. Normally he starts his naps sometime between 11 and 1. By the time it got to be 3:00 on Sunday I decided to toss Trent into his crib and just see what happens (I was desperate for him to nap because I wanted to nap in my bed too). I stayed with him and tried rubbing his back but he was ready to play. He'd stand up, sit down, lay down, sit up, stand up, lay down, etc. All the while talking to me and laughing. I laid down next to his crib and read him a book but he just wasn't ready to nap. Or so I thought. After an hour of sitting with him, I had to pee. I decided to leave him in his crib and the second I walked away he started crying - but a girl has to do what a girl has to do. I continued to the bathroom. By the time I was done peeing he was laying down and quiet (that's what? a minute). I was amazed. Apparently the trick is to leave the room. That, and/or the dinosaur pillow that we just started putting in his crib with him. It's crazy comfortable and soft and Trent loves it! I think it helps, but who knows. I plan to experiment more with naptime this upcoming weekend. Wish us luck. Hopefully it goes just as smoothly as bedtime. I'm thinking about getting a blackout shade for the window in his bedroom to help.
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